Saturday, May 16, 2020

Epistle/One







Here's the house with childhood
whittled down to a single red trip wire.
Don't worry.  Just call it horizon
& you'll never reach it.
                                        Ocean Vuong
                                        Someday I'll Love Ocean Vuong

Isn't it this: that epistles
are about listening, 
that the tip of the nib

is really just the beginning
that it travels back the entire
length of the arm & knows

instinctively it must turn
at the elbow and keep
going to the neck?

This is where I want
to ask, because there's 
this fork in the road: 

how does it know it needs
to split itself in two
like a blade of grass

that if torn down its middle
and held to the lips
and then blown gently 

                        through

will produce if not music
then a sound truer
than music because it sounds

so like the body letting go
of something it had been
holding on to afraid

to hand it over
in good company.  And see
the pale root end 

of the blade of grass
is intact like what remains
behind while whatever needs

to split takes its time 
past the clavicle to the throat
and parts - one to the chin -

and one toward the nipple - 
tell me do you know
where words live?  Behind

the bronze areola & through
the fatty memory of a baby
living there while life was

pulled out?  Or otherwise:
into the mouth or nose or ear
on its way to the left

hemisphere where the experts
say language lives?  How,
do you know, does the marriage

come together once 
its all the way back
and down, dilating at the wrist's

anchor on the page, the fingers
pointed and apart like two
knees and the nib between

them remembering, remembering?
Someone's come  a long
long way.  They're soaked 

from the dark and foamy
roads. They've stopped off
at their old home 

only to turn off at the bottom
before going in.  Someone
else lives there now.  A stranger.

A family of strangers.  
Maybe they're sitting 
at the same table

where years ago you threw
the hot broth at the wall.  Drops
of it, fat as snow, would fall

on my neck.  The scars
like commas.  This poet I know
calls them fetuses, those commas.

curled, paused, as awfully 
dependent on what's come 
before and what's yet to 

arrive to be completely legit
-imate.   It doesn't know
the first few words, Dear

_______, have been climbed
all night just to arrive, are entire
ranges dependent 

on the weather and only 
complete in the easiest 
of seasons.  Or the few words

beyond, flat as a johnny
cake you forgot
to add the leavening to

and tasteless after all that
stirring.  Epistle #1: should say,
then: Dear ___________, please

forgive the delay, I've been
detained in the worst way. the two
spaces that resemble each

other on the body like no other
twins- even eyes - even lungs -
even limbs and kidneys - even

testicles and even ovaries -  
maybe because they're resting
places: the divot above the lip

where Gabriel kissed 
the entire Torah and then made you
forget it, and the divot just 

below the neck, the jugular
notch, the yoke of knowing, 
the jumping off the croft

with all the words and worlds
swirling and twirling you've seen
them, you must've done, some

are at the foot of my bed
some are at the bottom 
of the pond and paused there

from when you stepped in
like a sachet of tea
leaves and steeped and steeped

the clean water,  Dear___________,
you are no longer thought of
as a body.  I want you to....






























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